The Tar Book and the Briar Patch

Old Stubby Bear made a little sticky tar book to finally catch the little pesky Storyteller Bunny. He left it by the tree where Bunny passes every day.

Storyteller Bunny was supposed to be off doing stuff for other people, meditating, and doing other good deeds like reading stories to fluffy kittens. Instead, it was sure enough that Little S. Bunny became glued to the Tar Baby Book. Old Stubby Bear came on by but Bunny never looked up, still stuck to the book right by the nose. Stubby Bear finally had Bunny right by the tail where he wanted the darn hoppy little Storyteller.

"Now I have you! I am going to tape your eyes shut and make you meditate!" the Old Bear yelled.

"Make me meditate!" the little Bunny yelled back. "Make me meditate only don't throw me in that awful briar patch!"

"I am out of tape anyway," the Bear said tossing the end of his roll and thinking. He then continued with, "I will drop you in the wolf pit and make you practice martial arts!"

"OH STUBBY BEAR, MAKE ME PRACTICE MARTIAL ARTS... only don't throw me in the briar patch with those great masses of tangles, paths and snags!" Storyteller Bunny pleaded.

"The wolf pit is too far away and you aren't even worth the extra mileage on my toes," Old Stubby said half pondering what he should do. "But I will get you a nice fur cut and make you do good deeds for little old ladies until you smell like Jean Nate!" Stubby said smiling meanly at the wonderful idea.

"I will do good deeds for those nice smelling ladies with the blue fur until my insides smell like Chanel No. 5!" Bunny exclaimed. "But please don't throw me in that huge chaotic prickly briar patch where one never knows what one will run into at any turn!"

"Well, I might not be able to stand all that Chanel myself," Bear thought half out loud, "But I will drop you off at the homeless shelter and make you work the soup kitchen until your real mind grows so big that it busts right through your little fur suit."

"That I can do!" insisted Storyteller Bunny, "And I will even eat the government issue chicken noodle soup myself but you know I can't stand to be in the briar patch!"

"The shelter is all the way across this one horse wood town anyway," Bear said as he gave Storyteller Bunny a great surprise heave into the prickly berry patch.

Stubby Bear listened and listened and heard nothing for awhile. Then he saw Storyteller Bunny in the center of the great patch waving and smiling and with a strawberry mustache and a blueberry paw hopping around singing, "Born in the berry patch!" just like Spruce Springbean used to. Old Stubby Bear waved his great paw in anger at the bunny and hollered over the singing, "What do you Storytellers eat for breakfast anyway? Nuts?"

Storyteller Bunny just kept on singing and dancing about being born and raised in the briar patch and that everything was a story anyway and citing passages from the baby tar book until it was time to hop off to sleep. Stubby Bear growled and threw logs into the patch and hollered, but way down deep inside he smiled. He already knew this storyline well and had heaved at least three bunnies this week alone. He went back to his cave after a days work well done humming a Spruce Springbean tune himself.